randomness…

Well, I had a cool entry for you with a lot of links to stuff… but I

accidentally closed my editor without saving so you are out of luck.

I’ll clue you in more tomorrow… but a quick run of

thoughts:

  • I am not yet the man I should be… and it is

    hurting my life.

  • Casual BDSM… you know, just picking up a belt

    and hitting someone who enjoys it because I want to and they want me to?

    Pretty alien to me at the moment. How the hell did that happen? if I can find

    it, if I can figure it out I think I will have something important.

  • It’s the 15th. Rent due again today. Either we

    figure something out today or tomorrow or it looks like we will lose the

    office/house next month. This is way uncool.

  • Health insurance issues – like $1,100 worth soon

    (days really) or Kimiko

    and Tatsumi get screwed over and lose a lot of medications. This also

    sucks.

  • I did yard work Sunday… can you believe that?

  • Investor meeting tomorrow. Hope and pray it is

    good. But they aren’t nearly going to put money in right away.

  • I need a lot of sleep.

  • Why is it I crave validation so much? What is

    wrong with me that I feel stronger when someone will bend a knee to me? This

    desire for strength is my weakness… if I am not careful me it will lead me

    to my knees someday I think.

  • Saw "Reign

    of Fire" last night (Sunday) and I think it rocked. The best plot ever?

    Nope. But it looked cool and I’ll probably want it on DVD someday.

  • In among the stress today however there was some

    happiness. My mind seemed more at ease today (Sunday)… that was good, and

    good for me. Smiles and casual contact… very good for me. 

Night!