I came across a few essays online today that amused me, as these things often do. I copied this one here without fear of copyright problems because the article is unattributed and thus is [[google:”the following is a composite profile of an Online Predator”|all over the net]] so it isn’t an issue.

This one is about the dreaded “Online Predator” and how to spot them so that you are not taken in, because clearly you are an idiot. Next in the series is “How to spot bad people at the post office” and “15 warning signs that your lunch is about to attack you”. Below is the essay with my comments interspersed, and below it is the essay in its “pure” form.

Oh, and here’s my safety advice: Not everyone in the world is nice or good. You might want to avoid those who are going to hurt you unless you want that. [[BDSM]] doesn’t change this principle.

The Online Predator
Unknown

The following is a composite profile of an Online Predator. This profile was compiled by a number of submissive women for the use of submissive women. It is written from the perspective of a submissive female whose nature requires her to respond to a dominant male.

Well already I am doing something wrong. Obviously as I am not a submissive female this thing wasn’t directed at me. I suppose even reading it makes me a bad person… let’s press on though.

1) Definition:

The Online Predator is one who uses the mechanisms of cyber space to hunt human beings with the intent to exploit, rob, plunder and pillage their body, mind, heart and soul.

As opposed to anyone in [[wp:meatspace]] who might be out to cause you harm. Frankly adult humans are completely unaware of the concept that someone in the world might not have their best interests are heart. Thank god a small number of people in the community (i.e. thousands of them0 have dedicated their lives to telling you how to judge the people you meet.

2) Characteristics of a Predator:

1. Liar: ( Self explanatory )

Ok. Liars are bad. So far, so good…

2. Deceiver: His self situation is presented as other than what it is.

Murkier territory, this might also mean someone who doesn’t spill his guts to strangers right away. Lets keep goin.

3. Betrayer: He is likely to break trust.

People who will betray you are bad for you, check. Thank god someone finally told me this!

4. Insecure: He is worried that others will be faithless.

So if you don’t trust people right away, say by thinking they are a “online predator”, then you are an “online predator”. Well, mystery solved, everyone is a predator.

5. Inconsistent: He will say one thing while doing another.

Sounds like a variation on the others, but OK.

6. Lacking Honor: Usually while protesting that he has honor.

Not worth discussing since I am sure the “unknown” authors and I do not share a concept of honor.

7. Lack of Respect: He will tend to denigrate others.

Hey, that’s me! Cool, I am a predator!. Because everyone (except those pesky predators) deserves my respect right?

8. Transient: He is unlikely to have many long term friends.

And you would know this right away because… umm… you wouldn’t. And of course we all know that if your picky about your friends your a dangerous person.

9 Manipulator: He calculates and contrives for his own benefit to the detriment of his partner.

I can go with that. I’m not sure I would consider it morally wrong though.

10. Secretive: He will tend to cloak himself and his activities.

Because we know all smart people tell someone thy meet online every detail of their lives right away,

11. Charming: If he could not steal your breath away, he would not be a successful hunter.

Stay away from people you are attracted to. It’s for your own good.

12. Selective: He will pick victims carefully, looking for weaknesses and filling those voids completely.

Of course, this is also one of the ways you find people who will respond to your dominance.

13. Chameleon: He will appear to fit any need perfectly and adapt to fill any desire.

If he seems like a good match for you, watch out!

14. Lacking in Self Control: Although at times, he may have extraordinary self control and discipline.

So if he has control be careful. If he doesn’t be careful. If he fluctuates, be careful.

A predator probably exhibits these characteristics in all aspects of his life. It may be that the only place the predator seems to have honor and value Truth is in the Relationship he is developing with his victim. When developing a new relationship, a submissive should make a conscious effort to observe her partner’s interaction with others, not just how he interacts with her. The predator may well reveal his true self through his interactions. But, the submissive may only see this revelation if she is committed to taking every precaution for her own safety.

Hmm… now there is an idea, actually pay attention to the person you might be with.

3) Predator Warning Signals:

While any of these phrases or actions may be acceptable in a given context, pay close attention when seeing or hearing them. Phrases:

Now we can tell who the bad people are…

1. Do not tell _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Remember, a good dom(tm) won’t care who you tell about all the private stuff he told you to show he wasn’t a predator (see above). Anyone who cares about their privacy is bad.

2. ( _ _ _ _ _ ) is crazy ! ( or psycho, sick, a liar, or out to get me )

Cause we all know there are no crazy/vindictive/vengeful people out there, so anyone who might be concerned about such people is a predator. Except the author of the essay, who is above suspicion.

3. It would be best if you no longer spoke to _ _ _ _ _ _ _.

And a good dom(tm) will never give you advice.

4. I do not need to defend myself against lies.

Since we have established that there are no vengeful, lying people in BDSM then clearly anyone who refuses to defend themselves against the (by definition factual and honest) accusations of others is evil!

5. They are just jealous ( of me, of us, of what we have, that you have me ).

Again, since everyone in BDSM (except predators) is honest and pure then clearly anyoen who questiosn the motives of those who speak against them is the true source of evil.

Actions:

1. May seldom be in the D/s chat rooms. Operates from other areas or private rooms.

Anyone who has an interest other than BDSM is evil. Check.

2. Has personal information which is incomplete or not verifiable.

Anyone who likes their privacy is evil. Gotcha.

3. Becomes defensive or angry when questioned.

Remember, your prying accusatory tone is nothing to be offended at! Dig away, you have the right to know everything!

4. Questions the sincerity of the submissive when questioned.

And how dare he think badly of you for demanding answers to any question you want!

5. He will usually discourage or forbid the practice of reference checks.

Again, since as we know everyone in BDSM tells the truth and never speaks badly of others without reason there is no possible justification for a dominant thinking that maybe you should form your own opinion of him instead of listening to every ranting ex girlfriend or scene detractor.

6. He will usually discourage or forbid the use of Safe Calls.

You might not know this, but a safe call once saved the Pope from a guy who wanted to put him in a barrel. They are perfect and above debate.

4) The Submissive’s Personal Warning Signals:

These are items that a submissive should pay attention to if she is saying them to herself or hearing them from others.

Remember, question your own instincts. Except later when we want you to trust them.

1. I feel he is just too good to be true.

Remember, anyone you are attracted to is evil.

2. You are hearing consistent warnings from more than one person.

Remember, BDSM politics never play a part int his stuff, so if more than one other person says someoen is bad it must be true.

3. Your instincts are whispering something is not right about this person.

This one I can agree with, as long as it is your instincts and not some paranoia drummed into your head by an essay by an unidentified group of subs 🙂

5) Summary:

The final best defense any submissive has against an Online Predator is her own common sense and judgment. The submissive should always remember that desires, needs, and the heat of the moment can combine to drown that judgment. Always take a moment to step back, take a deep breath and look at a potential partner with common sense and not with passion.

The should have just left this paragraph as the sole content of this otherwise worthless document.

The essay in “original” form…

The Online Predator
Unknown

The following is a composite profile of an Online Predator. This profile was compiled by a number of submissive women for the use of submissive women. It is written from the perspective of a submissive female whose nature requires her to respond to a dominant male.

The Online Predator

1) Definition:

The Online Predator is one who uses the mechanisms of cyber space to hunt human beings with the intent to exploit, rob, plunder and pillage their body,mind, heart and soul.

2) Characteristics of a Predator:

1. Liar: ( Self explanatory )
2. Deceiver: His self situation is presented as other than what it is.
3. Betrayer: He is likely to break trust.
4. Insecure: He is worried that others will be faithless.
5. Inconsistent: He will say one thing while doing another.
6. Lacking Honor: Usually while protesting that he has honor.
7. Lack of Respect: He will tend to denigrate others.
8. Transient: He is unlikely to have many long term friends.
9. Manipulator: He calculates and contrives for his own benefit to the detriment of his partner.
10. Secretive: He will tend to cloak himself and his activities.
11. Charming: If he could not steal your breath away, he would not be a successful hunter.
12. Selective: He will pick victims carefully, looking for weaknesses and filling those voids completely.
13. Chameleon: He will appear to fit any need perfectly and adapt to fill any desire.
14. Lacking in Self Control: Although at times, he may have extraordinary self control and discipline.

A predator probably exhibits these characteristics in all aspects of his life. It may be that the only place the predator seems to have honor and value Truth is in the Relationship he is developing with his victim. When developing a new relationship, a submissive should make a conscious effort to observe her partnerâs interaction with others, not just how he interacts with her. The predator may well reveal his true self through his interactions. But, the submissive may only see this revelation if she is committed to taking every precaution for her own safety.

3) Predator Warning Signals:

While any of these phrases or actions may be acceptable in a given context, pay close attention when seeing or hearing them. Phrases:

1. Do not tell _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ .
2. ( _ _ _ _ _ ) is crazy ! ( or psycho, sick, a liar, or out to get me )
3. It would be best if you no longer spoke to _ _ _ _ _ _ _.
4. I do not need to defend myself against lies.
5. They are just jealous ( of me, of us, of what we have, that you have me ).

Actions:

1. May seldom be in the D/s chat rooms. Operates from other areas or private rooms.
2. Has personal information which is incomplete or not verifiable.
3. Becomes defensive or angry when questioned.
4. Questions the sincerity of the submissive when questioned.
5. He will usually discourage or forbid the practice of reference checks.
6. He will usually discourage or forbid the use of Safe Calls.

4) The Submissive’s Personal Warning Signals:

These are items that a submissive should pay attention to if she is saying them to herself or hearing them from others.

1. I feel he is just too good to be true.
2. You are hearing consistent warnings from more that one person.
3. Your instincts are whispering something is not right about this person.

5) Summary:

The final best defense any submissive has against an Online Predator is her own common sense and judgment. The submissive should always remember that desires, needs, and the heat of the moment can combine to drown that judgment. Always take a moment to step back, take a deep breath and look at a potential partner with common sense and not with passion.