This was posted on a forum about the game Overlord 2, but it is worth applying to almost every aspect of your life.
How do I clean my Minion?
For best results, treat your Minion like a rug: Hang them over a rail and beat them until no dust or dirt remains.Are Minions child-friendly?
That depends on how fast your child can run.I have a cat, can I have a Minion too?
Minions will have no problems with any other pet you may have. Please note this may not work the other way round.Are Minions carbon neutral?
Although Minions are clean and efficient, a lot of what they do results in smoke and fire, which has been known to make Mother Earth cry. But burnt down villages produce zero emissions, so in a way they’re eco-warriors.How do I communicate with my Minion?
Minions understand most human languages, but for best results use violence.How long can I make a Minion work?
Minions are not unionised and have no helpline, charity or activists. Go nuts.How long do Minions live?
We’re not really sure as no Minion has ever died due to natural causes.How can I tell the gender of my Minion?
You should never try to do that. Ever.Should I neuter my Minion?
Only if you think it’s funny.How many Minions do I need?
That depends on what job you need done. A single Minion can easily mutilate the postman, but you need at least a dozen for world domination.What sort of stuff will I get to kill?
Your main source of victims will come from the brave and highly flammable ranks of the Glorious Empire, a sinister regime that gained power after the fall of the previous Overlord. You’ll be hacking your way through entire battalions at a time, but to keep the blood on your sword varied we’ve also thrown a few Yetis, Elves, villagers and annoyingly cute indigenous species into the mix, just to name but a few. Don’t say we never do anything for you.I’ve always wanted to enslave the human race, is this the game for me?
You’ve come to the right place! With the Domination style Overlord, humanity can become your plaything. Village by village, you’ll reap the benefits of an unwilling workforce as you drive the Glorious Empire from your lands.I’m more of a "watch the world burn" kind of guy, can I still get my rocks off?
We’ve got your pleasure, sir. With the Destruction style Overlord, you can ravage the land like a moody Tsunami; razing cities, forests and Imperial camps to the ground just because they looked at you funny.What can my minions do?
Minions are angry little Swiss army knives of pain: They can ride into battle on wolves and other magical creatures, loot the best weapons from stomped enemies, pillage houses for treasure, operate fearsome war machines, infiltrate enemy camps and polish your armour so thoroughly you’ll blind passing wildlife.What types of Minions can I rule?
This new batch of minions is smarter, faster, deadlier and wittier than the sorry sacks of skin you used to rule. Minions now come in four fantastic flavours: Browns are brutal brawlers that solve their problems with teeth and fists. Reds are the surly artillery who love to play catch, as long as it’s with fireballs. Greens are the stealthy assassins. Silent and deadly, like a fart on legs. Blues are no use in a fight but can resurrect fellow Minions who’ve tried to stop a sword with their face.
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