Tatsumi’s<\/a>
\nplace and I have something like three uninterrupted hours. Then I have all day
\ntomorrow. If I need it, I have all of Monday.<\/p>\nLet’s turn this boat around shall we?<\/p>\n
A lot of interesting factors bring me to this point – not the least of which
\nis the realization that I stopped living life the way I<\/i><\/b> wanted to
\na while ago – and I started measuring my life by how little I seemed to disturb
\nthose around me. I wanted to make sure that no one had to make any hard choices
\nat my hand – because I had no idea how those choices might go.<\/p>\n
In a sense, this has drawn those I need closer to me. In another and equally
\nreal sense it has pushed them away.<\/p>\n
I am not a big demander. I don’t make demands in fact, even of those I have
\nevery right to make demands of. I do<\/i> make requests. Silent, earnest
\nrequests that it seems are all the more powerful because I don’t honestly really
\nexpect anyone to step up and say ‘yes’ to them.<\/p>\n
The problem is, why are they saying yes?<\/p>\n
It turns out that I am not currently<\/i><\/u> very inspiring. For a
\nwhile, I thought this lack of inspiration value was my complete and utter lack
\nof money. Nope, it isn’t money. I have never had lots of money, and I was pretty
\ninspiring.<\/p>\n
My talent, my skill, my convictions, my honor, my drive and my vision. These
\nare the things that are inspiring from me. <\/p>\n
It turns out that I don’t think anyone around me is inspired by what I am<\/u><\/i>.
\nI think they are inspired as hell by what I can be<\/u><\/i>. <\/p>\n
The problem is, that what I am is not currently enough. This leaves those
\naround me who have cast their lot in with me confused and angry. They aren’t
\nsure what to do, what to be, or how to become it. No wonder they feel adrift and
\nlost, like maybe it is all a very bad idea.<\/p>\n
No, I am not going to solve this with money. The solution will create money,
\nbring wealth to me as it has in the past. My flock has been leaderless for too
\nlong, they are waiting for a sign I think and the longer they wait the further
\naway they drift.<\/p>\n
I am not going to solve this through help at this moment in time. For
\npractical and psychological reasons most of those around me have been forced to
\nturn their primary concerns inward – too busy keeping a roof over their own
\nheads to aspire to the visions I toss around so wildly. <\/p>\n
Of course they would help<\/i><\/b> and they do help<\/i><\/b>, every
\nday my team keeps giving me what they can spare and more to keep the
\ndreams alive. But there is simply too much, their incredible efforts are keeping
\nus alive and away from the cliff – but we aren’t pulling out of the spin. And
\nthey are doing it at a heavy personal price.<\/p>\n
My thanks to each and every one of them.<\/p>\n
If I want to turn this around<\/i><\/b> it will have to come from me, I
\nwill have to cut down the first trees and trample the first bit of the path. I
\nwill need to provide the direction and take some of the risks. I will need to do
\nthis not only because no one else has the time…<\/p>\n
I will need to do this because it is the only way to restore the faith –
\ntheirs and mine.<\/p>\n
What can I be?<\/u><\/i><\/b> baby watch this space and find out –
\nbecause this is going to be interesting.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
ready, set, go – this is gonna be interesting EGO WARNING Everyone is out but me. I am at Tatsumi’s place and I have something like three uninterrupted hours. Then I have all day tomorrow. If I need it, I have all of Monday. Let’s turn this boat around shall we? A lot of interesting […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":53149,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"aside","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[278],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1091"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1091"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1091\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/53149"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1091"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1091"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1091"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}