{"id":50915,"date":"2003-01-22T21:16:21","date_gmt":"2003-01-22T21:16:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.soulhuntre.com\/items\/date\/2003\/01\/22\/rusted-armor-broken-horse\/"},"modified":"2003-01-22T21:16:21","modified_gmt":"2003-01-22T21:16:21","slug":"rusted-armor-broken-horse-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/2003\/01\/22\/rusted-armor-broken-horse-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Rusted armor, broken horse\u2026"},"content":{"rendered":"

OK. This sucks.<\/p>\n

I know<\/i> I am doing everything I can. I know<\/i> I have a skill set<\/p>\n

and a plan that will work. I know<\/i> that the sacrifices I am making now<\/p>\n

will pay off hugely in the future for me and all those in my pack I hold dear.<\/p>\n

\n

I know this – or I would not be doing it.<\/b><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

However, there is a gnawing feeling in my gut sometimes… the one that says<\/p>\n

in a little voice:<\/p>\n

\n

"Daddy, are you really<\/i> going to be there for me if I need you?"<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

God yes baby… I will be there for you, always. I can always take you away<\/p>\n

if you want. It might not be to the palace we both hope for yet. It might not be<\/p>\n

to a life completely to your liking… but we will be together, and when that<\/p>\n

happens anything seems to be possible to me.<\/p>\n

    \n
  • I am doing my best.<\/li>\n
  • I am working as hard as I can.<\/li>\n
  • I don’t sleep.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    Why is it sometimes I still feel like I am failing them?<\/p>\n

    Ed. Note: I’ll be OK. You don’t need to console me on this or tell me it’s<\/p>\n

    all OK. I just need to say it and get it out of my head sometimes.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    OK. This sucks. I know I am doing everything I can. I know I have a skill set and a plan that will work. I know that the sacrifices I am making now will pay off hugely in the future for me and all those in my pack I hold dear. I know this – […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":53154,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"aside","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[278],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50915"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=50915"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50915\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/53154"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=50915"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=50915"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=50915"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}