{"id":50949,"date":"2003-03-07T08:51:53","date_gmt":"2003-03-07T08:51:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.soulhuntre.com\/items\/date\/2003\/03\/07\/mms-suicide-and-lesbians\/"},"modified":"2003-03-07T08:51:53","modified_gmt":"2003-03-07T08:51:53","slug":"mms-suicide-and-lesbians-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/2003\/03\/07\/mms-suicide-and-lesbians-2\/","title":{"rendered":"M&Ms, suicide and lesbians\u2026"},"content":{"rendered":"

As you may well know, I am a big fan of
\nEverything2<\/a>. I use it as one of my reference sources and also as a good
\nplace to pull a funny quote or two. Last night I wound up getting involved in a
\nfairly deep node safari<\/i><\/b>. I figured I’d put it up here in case you
\nwanted to follow along.<\/p>\n

If you do you’ll learn a little something about sex, a little about suicide,
\nlots about lesbians and anime and more about M&M’s then you thought you would
\nlearn today<\/i>.<\/p>\n

Go ahead, skim it… step inside my mind. Under each link I put a
\nrepresentative quotation – it is by no means the entire contents of the
\navailable information. E2 is funny, informative and cool.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

\n
\nArguments for the perceived impending invasion of Earth by atomic-powered
\nKillbots from Planet X@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"(This node presents an idea I’ve had for a long time, and its noding
\n has not been
\n inspire<\/a>d
\n by anyone else. I am a
\n
\n persecuted genius<\/a>, and if you say otherwise, you
\n SUCK<\/a>!
\n
\n On the ball, no erase-um, no change-um, no nothing<\/a>.)"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nBig Breasts, Small Waist@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"The RPG<\/a>
\n game of which
\n
\n Big Eyes, Small Mouth<\/a> is a mere degraded
\n parody<\/a>
\n of. This extremely
\n realistic<\/a>
\n piece of
\n artwork<\/a> enables you to adventure on the
\n hentai<\/a>
\n world, dealing with the
\n
\n lifestyle<\/a> and
\n
\n dangers<\/a> of an
\n
\n inhabitant<\/a> of that universe. (AKA how to deal with three
\n
\n gangbangs<\/a> every day)."<\/i><\/p>\n

E.d. note; Here is
\n
\n a link to the game<\/a>.<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Big Eyes, Small
\nMouth@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"One of the best things about BESM is that the character generation
\n system is balanced, which is often hard to do in multi-genre games. A game
\n where mecha<\/a>
\n pilots team up with
\n
\n magical girls<\/a> and
\n
\n streetwise<\/a>
\n
\n gumshoes<\/a> is entirely within the realm of mechanical possibility."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nshort skirt, big brain@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"when
\n it works, it’s awesome<\/a>. you go into your
\n isp<\/a>, for
\n instance, and the guy
\n
\n behind the counter<\/a> starts checking you out, being
\n
\n very nice<\/a> and
\n
\n very helpful<\/a> because he’s
\n
\n mistaken<\/a> you for a
\n
\n skanky cheerleader<\/a>. then,
\n
\n before he knows what hit him<\/a>, you start throwing
\n
\n tech jargon<\/a> and him and demanding
\n 100 MB<\/a>
\n more space for your
\n webpage<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nMe And A Gun@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"One of the most
\n
\n profound experiences<\/a> that I have ever had was to see this song performed
\n for 20,000 deadly silent people. Concerts are
\n
\n loud and excited<\/a>, even
\n
\n Tori Amos<\/a> concerts, but every single person in that audience stopped and
\n listened when she played that song. I cannot think of any way to show greater
\n respect for her, her song or her
\n experience<\/a>.
\n It has touched me forever."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\nI
\nnever thought I would node this.@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"The guy smiled a lot if I remember right, and I’m not sure that I do.
\n He had thick
\n glasses<\/a>,
\n I think. But days in the
\n
\n tree house<\/a>. It was ours, fuck everyone else, when we were there we were
\n it. So many glory days when we were
\n king<\/a>s.
\n <\/i><\/p>\n

It ended at
\n dusk<\/a> with
\n blood<\/a>
\n all over our tree house."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nAnime ain’t anime without tentacle rape@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"I don’t think this w\/u is in particularly
\n
\n bad taste<\/a>, so it really is a puzzle why it is so controversial. It
\n occurred to me that, as a by-and-large minority pasttime, perhaps some
\n otaku<\/a>
\n are a little defensive about the
\n
\n perception<\/a> of
\n anime<\/a> –
\n labelling as
\n
\n cartoon porn<\/a> was the last of my intentions."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

fan
\nservice@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Xena<\/a>
\n and
\n Gabrielle<\/a> sharing a moment of
\n subtext<\/a>,
\n Trowa<\/a>
\n and
\n Quatre<\/a> from
\n
\n Gundam Wing<\/a> playing music together, the lovingly detailed footage of
\n Voltron<\/a>
\n forming, or a random yet popular
\n
\n redshirt<\/a> or
\n
\n bridge bunny<\/a> suddenly getting lines… Fan service, all of it."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Why 2 AM is the best
\ntime to be alive@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"A friend of mine and I were discussing the node "it’s
\n 2 in the morning and i own the world.<\/a>" the other night, and we came up
\n with a mildly
\n
\n plausible<\/a>
\n theory<\/a>
\n on why that is. Our best guess is that your senses are tuned in more."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nThe Dark Tower Series@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"In
\n
\n King<\/a>‘s collection of
\n
\n short stories<\/a>,
\n
\n Everything’s Eventual<\/a>, one of the stories is a sort of
\n prequel<\/a>
\n to The Gunslinger. The story’s title is "The
\n Little Sisters of Eluria<\/a>", and is very much a
\n
\n Dark Tower<\/a> story. Interestingly, in the
\n
\n brief introduction<\/a> to the story, King mentioned how hard it was to write
\n something related to the Dark Tower series as "short" — The Dark Tower always
\n wants to be "epic<\/a>",
\n he wrote."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nOnly at Chuck E. Cheese’s, in the small hours with a gun in my hand, do I feel
\ntruly alive@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

This node is empty – you should go put something there.<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

bridge
\nbunnies@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Other examples include
\n
\n Uhura<\/a>,
\n
\n Sulu<\/a>, and
\n
\n Chekov<\/a> from
\n
\n Star Trek<\/a>:TOS<\/a>,
\n
\n Maya Ibuki<\/a>,
\n
\n Makoto Hyuuga<\/a>, and
\n
\n Shigeru Aoba<\/a> from
\n
\n Evangelion<\/a>, as well as Lt. Corwin and various other "Tech #1"s from
\n
\n Babylon 5<\/a>"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nHey, would you mind if I was infatuated with you for a week@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"That would have been good if it lasted only a week but a couple years
\n ago I drove into an
\n oak
\n tree<\/a> thinking about her and I haven’t seen her for twenty five years, but
\n damn <\/b>it was
\n
\n a great fifteen minutes<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nThe day I realized how sane I really am@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Some weird medicine, 32 oz of activated charcoal, and 4 bags of saline
\n later, they sent me with a cop to the state
\n
\n mental health facility<\/a>. I think it was around 6am. I had to wait til noon
\n for the doctor to get there. I was checked in and sat in the waiting room. As
\n I looked around, I noticed that I was the youngest person there. I also
\n noticed, I was one of the very few who seemed to be aware of where I was."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

What if Dr. Seuss
\ntaught Japanese rope bondage@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

Just go read it.<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nIf Dr. Seuss wrote for Star Trek@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Data<\/a>:
\n
\n Our ship<\/a> can get there very fast
\n But still the
\n trip<\/a> will last and last
\n We’ll have two
\n days<\/a> til
\n we arrive<\/a>
\n But can the Indrans there
\n survive<\/a>?"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nGame Master Rules of Admonition@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

Go read.<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nI
\nSucked a Lot of Cock to Get Where I Am@Everything2.com<\/a><\/i><\/p>\n

\n

"I bet you think I have it
\n easy<\/a>
\n don’t you? You think I
\n mosey<\/a>
\n on in here at
\n
\n 9:00 am<\/a>, say hello to my
\n
\n secretary<\/a> and shut myself up in an office untill
\n
\n 5:00 pm<\/a>. Well let me tell you somthing pal, they did not make me President
\n of
\n
\n Hostess Cakes<\/a> Inc. for nothing."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nQuick and easy steps to a successful blow job@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

(two quotes to get you to go…)<\/p>\n

"On a side note, there has been much research into the
\n
\n gag reflex<\/a> itself. Apparently, a person’s gag reflex is at its lowest
\n sensitivity in the morning, right after you’ve woken up. Imagine your lover’s
\n suprise when, instead of kissing them on the lips with your ungodly
\n
\n morning breath<\/a>, you delicately slip under the sheets and wake them up
\n
\n Traci Lords<\/a> style. Hell, if it’s easier in the AM, I’m all for putting
\n this
\n
\n alarm clock<\/a> into action."<\/i><\/p>\n

"I’m only 17. I’ve only had\/given
\n blowjob<\/a>s
\n to three different guys. However, as a man, I feel that I have some
\n
\n helpful advice<\/a> for this node.
\n
\n I knows what I likes<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nEverything Japanese Encyclopedia@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"After 1662 entries, the EJE grew too big to fit in a single e2node.
\n After consulting with several
\n
\n editors<\/a>, a plan for breaking up the Encyclopedia was organized. It has
\n been broken into sub-nodes by content. Three sections were not liberated;
\n "Other", "Social Life\/Leisure", and "Tales from Japan" will be kept in this
\n writeup until they get large enough to merit their own nodes. The "Food"
\n section has been split up: the
\n Cookery<\/a>
\n project has absorbed the listing of
\n
\n Japanese Recipes<\/a> into that node, while other aspects of Japanese
\n cuisine<\/a>,
\n such as general dish descriptions and
\n
\n etiquette<\/a>, may be found in
\n
\n Japanese Food<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nWell if it’s gonna be THAT kinda party, then I’m gonna stick my dick in the
\nmashed potatoes!@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Could be heard
\n
\n throughout<\/a> the
\n
\n neighborhood<\/a> of Southern Pine Trail Knight’s Landing
\n
\n apartment<\/a> complex on the night of March 20th, 2000. It was
\n report<\/a>ed
\n that an apparently
\n
\n inebriated<\/a> 20-year-old red-headed male shouted this to several people,
\n including two
\n police<\/a>
\n officers in a car nearby."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Let’s not start
\nsucking each other’s dicks quite yet, gentlemen@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Ever come to a stunning realization that what you just discovered is
\n going to get you fired?"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

How do you get a
\nGoth out of a tree@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Cut the
\n rope<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nThat Little Bitch Marla Singer A Cultural Critique of Sexism in Fight
\nClub@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"The way Marla is presented and portrayed is important because she
\n becomes an excuse for most of the sexism in the film. After being shown as
\n dark and irrational, the audience isn’t offended when Tyler tells Jack that he
\n is "sport
\n fucking<\/a>" her."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

I
\nonce helped Jason Priestley’s girlfriend find his dick@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Ah, AOL<\/a>
\n in the early
\n 90s<\/a>. A far different place than it is today. Back then,
\n spam<\/a> was
\n kept in cans for the most part, and one could always get online during
\n
\n peak usage hours<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Some of our best
\nfriends are three minutes long@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"When the bus stopped in
\n
\n Culpeper<\/a>, most of the riders didn’t get off. Knowing that I had another
\n five hours until we got to
\n
\n Williamsburg<\/a>, I headed for the restroom and the snackbar. It was about 10
\n at night and the food counter was closed. I was at the mercy of the
\n
\n snack machines<\/a>, and they looked
\n puny<\/a>. One
\n bag of
\n
\n Barbecued pork rinds<\/a> and a column of
\n
\n Fig Newtons<\/a>. 14 other empty rows of little white half circles, snack
\n tombstones."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nDoes this dress make me look fat@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"I think a good "safe<\/a>"
\n answer is to
\n leer<\/a> and say "Take
\n it off<\/a>, and I’ll
\n
\n let you know<\/a>,
\n bayBAY<\/a>!"
\n Add
\n
\n lip-licking<\/a> and
\n
\n slurping noise<\/a>
\n
\n punctuation<\/a>
\n to
\n taste<\/a>. This response has the
\n
\n double virtue<\/a> of…"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nThe principles of nuclear weapon safety and meeting girls are remarkably
\nsimilar@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Northern Blvd.
\n
\n Burger King<\/a>. 4.03 PM. A slight breeze blows from the east. The commerce
\n district of Queens approximates a population of fifty thousand during optimal
\n peaks. Medium vanilla shake with fries.
\n
\n Pink hair<\/a> pulled back into a short, neat ponytail. She’s reading
\n
\n Cryptonomicon<\/a>. Sweet Jesus, she’s a
\n
\n Neal Stephenson<\/a> fan."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

I
\njust spent $175.00 on black silk underwear@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"I stopped back at her room to see if she was there. She certainly was,
\n wearing the
\n
\n sexy outfit<\/a>. She looked stunning, and
\n
\n the guy who was fucking her<\/a> must’ve appreciated it as well. She let out a
\n yell, I punched the guy in the nose. He fell over, still glistening from where
\n he and she were joined. She started crying and saying how sorry she was. He
\n was crying because I had broken his nose. I was
\n pissed<\/a>,
\n I left."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nThe C++ Programming Language Freakshow@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Every week I discover something about
\n C++<\/a>
\n (see my
\n writeup<\/a>
\n there for my
\n
\n "unbiased" opinion<\/a>). Some days I think of writing my own
\n
\n C++ book<\/a>. I shall call it
\n
\n Revolting C++<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nHow to win bets and make enemies with a simple card trick@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Now, we
\n deal<\/a> the
\n cards into 3 piles and then recombine them into a single
\n deck<\/a>.
\n Since we are dealing into
\n three<\/a>
\n piles and there are
\n seven<\/a>
\n cards in each pile, it can be seen that the new
\n
\n position<\/a> of our card in the deck
\n y<\/a> is given by<\/p>\n

y = 7( x
\n mod<\/a>
\n 3 ) + ( x div<\/a>
\n 3 )"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nHOWTOs on Everything@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"The grand list of
\n HOWTO<\/a>
\n nodes on Everything"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nMy Religion teacher spoke for God@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

At 13, I was in a
\n
\n boarding school<\/a> in
\n Sussex<\/a>,
\n England<\/a>,
\n where I took 12 subjects, one of which was
\n
\n religion<\/a>. From my desk in the
\n
\n coveted back row<\/a>, I watched my very first
\n
\n religion teacher<\/a> with great interest. She started off the school year
\n reading from the
\n Bible<\/a>,
\n but a few weeks into it,
\n
\n confided<\/a> in us that she was receiving nightly
\n
\n telephone calls<\/a> from
\n God<\/a> and
\n that He<\/a> was
\n telling her what to
\n teach<\/a>
\n us.<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nNever do card tricks for the people you play poker with@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"And outside, in the alley, hours later, he knew where he’d gone wrong.
\n He could feel it then, wandering through the pre-dawn cold, feeling sick
\n inside knowing with a
\n
\n grave certainty<\/a> that everything was gone. It was like a great chasm, his
\n new found knowledge, spreading wide at the very center of himself.
\n
\n The last spark of his youth was extinguished<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nHow do they make M&M’s@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Additionally, when you bite in to one, you can see that there are in
\n fact two coatings. First the candy shell, and then the thin coloring coat —
\n So whatever they are doing, they are doing it twice<\/b>! And on a pretty
\n grand<\/a>
\n scale too!"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Mutant
\nM&M’s@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"And we all know you
\n
\n don’t judge a book by its cover<\/a>, so why should a little
\n
\n discoloring<\/a>, and alteration in
\n shape<\/a>
\n and
\n texture<\/a> make any difference!?! Especially if the added
\n flavor<\/a>
\n more than over
\n
\n compensate<\/a>s!"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nStamping M&M’s@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"Another<\/a>
\n issue with
\n
\n M&M’s<\/a> is the
\n
\n painstaking<\/a> stamping of each and every one… We all know that each end
\n every one of those oh so
\n
\n smooth<\/a><\/b> chocolate balls is stamped with the character "m", but why?"<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nHow M&M’s Are Really Made@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"The single-colored batches of candy are combined into mixtures of
\n red<\/a>,
\n yellow<\/a>,
\n blue<\/a>,
\n green<\/a>,
\n brown<\/a>
\n and
\n orange<\/a>. They’re
\n sifted<\/a>
\n to eliminate misshapen pieces, and then transported to the machine that will
\n put the "m’s" on their shells."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nEverything database of M&M color distribution@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"As part of the investigation of
\n
\n statistical anomalies in M&M color distribution<\/a>, I encourage Everything
\n members to
\n
\n count your M&M colors<\/a> and record the totals here. I suggest, to increase
\n the statistical sample, that we focus on plain M&Ms rather than the other
\n types…but lovers of peanut, almond, crunch, and peanut butter
\n M&Ms<\/a>
\n are also encouraged to leave information here."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nHow to scare the living shit out of an arachnophobe with a black
\nshoelace@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"A little something I discovered while I was wondering around my house
\n at 3 in the morning pulling stuff of shelves. This is done in 6
\n
\n easy steps<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

I
\nwill REMOVE the fucking toilet seat if you don’t shut up@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"This rant isn’t due to the fact that I am
\n
\n unwilling<\/a> to help women with this admitted deficiency. Rather, I find it
\n
\n infuriating<\/a> that because women are seemingly unable to check to make sure
\n that the toilet seat is down, they take this anger out on me. It becomes my
\n deficiency, I am less of a person because I cannot remember to put the seat
\n down\/lid up."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nthings that make juniors scream like little girls@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"As I reached the door of the lab, I heard a
\n
\n peculiar, high-pitched noise<\/a>. I looked back, and saw the
\n
\n afore-mentioned<\/a>
\n junior<\/a>
\n looking at the screen and
\n
\n screaming like a little girl<\/a>."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n


\nThings I’ve learned about lesbians from porn@Everything2.com<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

"I am an
\n
\n 18 year old teenage male<\/a>. In spending my time living up to that title I’ve
\n learned quite a few things about lesbians that I’d never knew before. I have
\n to think that these things are all true, as these lesbians are
\n
\n professionals<\/a>, I mean, they get paid for having "Hot
\n Wild Big Breasted Lesbian Sex<\/a>." I’ve decided to share my knowledge with
\n you lucky people. You can thank me later."<\/i><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As you may well know, I am a big fan of Everything2. I use it as one of my reference sources and also as a good place to pull a funny quote or two. Last night I wound up getting involved in a fairly deep node safari. I figured I’d put it up here in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":53211,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"aside","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[278],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50949"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=50949"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/50949\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/53211"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=50949"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=50949"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/legacyiamsenseiken.local\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=50949"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}